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By Alan Young

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Robes

Location: Palpatine’s throne room Panel 1: Royal guard 1: “Between you and me…” Guard 2: “Mmm?” Guard 1: “I don’t know how long this Empire thing is gonna last. The military’s spread thin. Clones have been replaced by conscripts. Rebel cells are popping up everywhere.” Guard 2: “Mmm.” Panel 2: Guard 1: “I just think the emperor has no clothes, you know?” Palpatine, in the background: “I heard that!” Guard 2: “Uh-oh.” Panel 3: Palpatine: “I assure you, I am fully clothed.” Guard 1: “Yes, of course. My apologies, your imperial highness.” Palpatine: “As a matter of fact…” Panel 4: Palpatine: “I am mostly clothes! These robes are bulky. I’m all skin and bones and midichlorians underneath. I can barely keep food down anymore. When it does stay down, it tends to exit the other end rapidly.” Guard 2: “Yes, sir. We’ve noticed.”
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Published November 6, 2026
Categorized as Comics Tagged Palpatine, Royal Guard, Star Wars

Ninja Force

Panel 1: Sixshot: “So your enemy has a Ninja Force and you’re jealous.” 2: Cobra Commander: “It’s not jealousy. They’ve got a real tactical advantage that I need to counter. My ninjas are so disorganized.” 3: CoCo: “And maybe I’m a little jealous. Ninjas are pretty cool with all their stealth and sabotage and assassination.” Sixshot: “My friend, it’s a good thing you called Sixshot, Ninja Consultant. One of the most important aspects of being a ninja is intimidation. Ninjas look scary as hell. In order to be an effective ninja leader, you need to look and act the part. I call it ninjattitude. I’ve brought some gear for you to try out.” 4: Caption: “Soon…” Cobra Commander (Ninja Force): “How do I look?” Sixshot: “Perfect! A true Ninja Force commander in the making.” CoCo (holding up a large red tri-blade thing): “Why is this spinny thing made of red plastic?” Sixshot: “It’s your first day of ninja training.” 5: “I wouldn’t want you to put your mushy human body in danger until you’re proficient with ninja weaponry.” CoCo: “I guess that makes sense. Hell, the plastic one put a hole in my glove.” Sixshot: “That reminds me…” 6: “I can offer you a very competitive rate on a comprehensive ninjsurance policy.”
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Published October 9, 2026
Categorized as Comics Tagged Cobra Commander, G.I. Joe, Sixshot, Transformers

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