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By Alan Young

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The Eyes Have It

Location: Decepticon base Panel 1: Shockwave: “You seem disturbed, Megatron. May I inquire as to the source of your trouble?” Megatron: “It’s the recent American election, Shockwave.” 2: Megatron, smiling: “The humans have fully and democratically embraced fascism, Shockwave. An authoritarian government headed by some of the stupidest people possible! Meanwhile, even members of the so-called opposition party are compromising their values in a futile effort to win over the authoritarians.” 3: Shockwave: “I am aware of recent events, Megatron. The impending dysfunction will make it simple for us to plunder the resources of this planet.” Megatron: “That’s the problem, Shockwave.” 4: Megatron: “I’m bored! I can’t come up with a scheme that’s more effective than what the humans have done to themselves! All we have to do right now is wait.” Shockwave: “I see.” 5: Shockwave, holding up a Scrabble box: “May I interest you in a game of Scrabble to help pass the time?” Megatron: “Fine.” Shockwave: “I have removed half of the I tiles to even the odds.”
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Published December 20, 2024
Categorized as Comics Tagged Megatron, Shockwave, Transformers

Measure of a Snowman

Location: World Between Worlds Panel 1: Frosty the Snowman: “Happy birthday!” 2: Anakin Skywalker (old ghost): “Ahsoka, this is Frosty the Snowman.” Ahsoka: “How do you do?” Frosty: “Not well. I’m having something of an existential crisis.” 3: Frosty: “Some children built me out of snow. My body is composed entirely of water. I have no organs or even a brain. Yet I can talk and move and laugh and play and have existential crises. I’m only alive – if you can call it that – because of this magic hat. Am I a person? Or am I just an old silk hat fantasizing of anthropomorphism? Do I have a soul, Ahsoka?” Ahsoka: “Um. All are one with the force.” 4: Frosty: “I appreciate the thought, but I’m afraid that’s more of a platitude than an answer. Also, thanks to climate change, I now spend most of the year dead.” Ahsoka: “What’s the lesson you want me to learn from this, Master?” 5: Anakin: “No lesson, Snips. I just wanted you to see this cool snowman. Those kids built him structurally sound arms and legs without the need for any internal support.” Ahsoka: “That’s some quality snowmanship.”
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Published December 13, 2024
Categorized as Comics Tagged Ahsoka Tano, Anakin Skywalker, Frosty the Snowman, Star Wars

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